I worked outside for years and did landscaping in high school. Every car I own has a roll of TP in it.
My grandad has taught me from his previous experiences. There's three things you always keep in your car. Jumper cables, a rain coat, and toilet paper.
Always gotta have a squished shitty TP roll and a glove box or door compartment full of fast food/gas station napkins for all your messy emergencies.
What is it about the environment behind the backseat of my truck that seems to deteriorate toilet paper?
Hot toot did make me throw up, if it makes you feel better. I had to call my mom and tell her. The conversation went like this me: mom, I’m dying. I shit the bed. Send help. Mom: who is this?
My dad keeps a smashed roll of tp with him at all times. He once pulled over driving to come hang out with my brother and I and shit on the side of the interstate. To be fair there isn’t any gas stations or anything where he was and he knew it.
Having a spare roll of TP is entry level. I have dude wipes on me most times for any surprise scenario or when traveling. Tailgating / football games is an absolute must. Edit: I also have a water bottle attachment bidet nozzle. I take this shit…seriously.
I keep a travel pack in my desk drawer and I’ll grab a few and stuff them in my pocket before I go to the bathroom to tidy up.
This The wet pocket always bugs, and I can't figure out what to do with em once I'm in the stall Don't wanna leave em in the pocket just soaking into my pants Don't really want to take em out and put em anywhere in the stall
Just rest them on the TP holder if it's one of those big plastic case ones. Who cares, really. You're wiping your ass with them anyway
I take them out of my pocket and put them on the toilet paper holder when I get in the stall and flush them because I don’t live there.
That’s if I’m wearing jeans. If I’m for whatever reason wearing khakis at work for a meeting then I just take the whole pack in my pocket and slip them back into my desk when I get back.
Imagining you pulling out that water bottle at a tailgate and excusing yourself to the portapotty, "Pardon me fellas, gotta take a shit then douche my ass so I'm fresh."
#TrumpSmells Becomes Top Trend in U.S. As Claims of Putrid Odor Go Viral The hashtag become the nation's top trend after team Trump threw a stink over the claims. Brett Meiselas The hashtag #TrumpSmells quickly skyrocketed to the top trending topic in the United States on X after Donald Trump's team threw a stink over claims that the ex-president and criminal defendant has an "odor" that is "truly something to behold." wrote, “I’m genuinely surprised how people close to Trump haven’t talked about the odor. It’s truly something to behold. Wear a mask if you can." As the claims of Trump's putrid odor went viral, others chimed in to confirm Kinzinger's claims. told The Independent, "Adam Kinzinger farted on live TV and is an unemployed fraud. He has disgraced his country and disrespects everyone around him because he is a sad individual who is mad about how his miserable life has turned out." Notably, Trump's spokesperson did not deny the claims regarding his boss's odor. Nor is there any evidence to support Trump's claims about Kinzinger flatulating on live television. There are, however, multiple clips of Donald Trump appearing to release gas while on television and during important meetings. In February 2018, as Trump and a bipartisan group of lawmakers met to discuss gun violence, the former president appeared to fart while sitting next to the late Senator Diane Feinstein. Noel Casler, a former staffer on The Apprentice, claimed in a video that Donald Trump's incontinence and foul odor was a frequent issue on the set of the ex-president's reality show. https://cdn.jwplayer.com/previews/V1qfn3Wn "The diapers is not a joke," Casler began. "He would often soil himself on The Apprentice set. He's incontinent from all the speed, all the Adderall he does, all the cocaine that he's done for decades...His [bowels] are uncontrollable." Casler claimed that Trump has been wearing diapers since the 1990s and the he had a chance to witness it firsthand in the late 2000s, while working on the set of The Apprentice. "We'd have to stop the show and change him and that was Keith Schiller's job. He would take him off set, he would wipe him down. Our nickname for Keith was 'Wet Wipes.' It's not a joke. It's happened several times," alleged Casler. Schiller served as director of security for The Trump Organization and later served as Deputy Assistant to Trump and Director of Oval Office Operations during the Trump presidency. Casler then went on and listed numerous times in which he believed Trump "evacuated himself" in front of world leaders and U.S. politicians. Casler also described an alleged incident in which Trump became so full of rage at being unable to read the word "arbitrage" on a cue card during a recording session and "very loudly evacuated his bowels" while screaming on set. Casler claimed he was he was able to smell it and that the stench caused the person holding the boom microphone to "tear up." He also noted that the crew's nickname for Celebrity Apprentice was "The Shitshow" due to these frequent incidents.
I thought I was gonna need this thread earlier today. Took groot on a walk before my morning constitution but after two cups of coffee and oh boy was it an adventure.
Sitting at my desk. Felt a fart comin, let it loose. Liquid. Tossed the underwear in the shower with me. Fortunately I closed the valve quick so not much damage.
that end of the year diet / drinking can catch us up with us all. my body begging to get back on the normal schedule following the holidays. I get it.
Oh lord, the day after Christmas I had to come into the office and I thought I was going to die from shitting. We went to our friends’ house on Christmas Day and my buddy’s wife made legit seafood gumbo. It was amazing but I ate like 3 bowls of it and the next day my guts were wrecked. My stomach sounded like a marching band warming up.