Apparently the Director left and reported a bunch of shit. So that happened in February, then we were notified, about it from state investigators. Incidents happened last summer some time, but just came to light in Feb
God damn, guessing your son wasn't the only one affected. That really sucks, hope you guys get some resolution.
Finally got the call to come to the hospital at 11pm (4 hours late). We show up to check in pack a luggage cart full of 3 suitcases, laptop bag, pillows, a nurses snack basket, etc. Lady walks in right after us without even a purse and asks “what floor is labor and delivery?” It is our first but guessing it’s not hers.
New fear unlocked: Got notified that a counselor at the YMCA after-school pushed my 10 yr old daughter this past Friday (they were fired bc of it). After getting over being furious at the fact that I wasn't notified until 5-days later, I realized that my daughter didn't tell me either. That made me connect a dot that she is absolutely terrified of getting in trouble and (in her mind) letting people down. So my new fear is that she might be a prime target for a predator in the future. I'm sure that's a fear for anyone with a daughter, but her personality traits (self-isolates, wants to please everyone, afraid to break any rules, feels shame over nothing she did wrong, secretive/tells convincing white lies) combined with her about to make a big transition (middle school) is making it feel a lot more real.
Teaching my kids (especially daughters) how to navigate these kind of situations, knowing boundaries, etc is definitely daunting. Best of luck man
Last night my oldest (7) had his last game in a winter league he was playing in. It was the toughest goddamn season I've had to sit through. I was constantly enraged and almost became *that* parent/dad multiple times. The coach had zero clue what he was doing, put in zero effort/planning, and we just had a dead group of teammates/parents who didn't consistently show up and the ones that did show up were some of the most uncoordinated kids who didn't even understand basic rules. Immediately after games I would be legit mad.... after I had time to cool down, it made me sad. It wasn't just me either. My son was so pissed off during the games that other kids were not trying that he would visibly show it. On the car rides home we'd have long conversations about it. I put the kids to bed last night and was so worked up I just sat in a chair with a beer in hand and stared into empty space. I eventually came to the conclusion that maybe it's good for him to struggle with an experience like this. I'm probably just going to let it ride, but part of me wants to write a letter to the league and tell them to get their shit together.
We had a similar experience in fall soccer. I never realized how much a coach could effect youth sports so much, even down to players just not showing up. So bad that I volunteered this spring to be an assistant coach to one of our previous coaches who was excellent. Well the league decided we were trying to stack a team. And told us I could still coach, but my boy wouldn't be on my team. I was furious and it probably transmitted down to little man and he didn't want to play at all. Ended up not coaching myself. And little mam is on a different coaches team who seems a lot more engaged and actually coaches. So we will see how it goes
Soccer. My son is obsessed with it and has been for years. He takes sports very seriously, just like I did growing up. I understand that not everyone is as intense about it as we are, but the complete lack of effort on all parties was pathetic. Before I was married and had kids, I coached for travel teams for a number of years. What I saw in those years made me decide that I wouldn't coach my own kid in a league. This league that we were in had a similar situation that you described. They have tryouts at the beginning of the year and then sort kids into tiers. They make sure to balance out the top and bottom tiers so that there aren't too many of one tier on any team. There is one loophole though... if you're a coach, your kids are automatically on your team. One team had 5 dads who were coaches and they were all able to put their kids on the same team. Those same kids play hockey, football, soccer, baseball, basketball together and the dads do the same thing in each league. They're only 8 year olds, but their chemistry is :chefs kiss: it's really quite something to see, but also sucks ass to be on the flip side of that. They would routinely win games with scoreline of like 20-3 and the other team barely possessing the ball.
The little bit of time when I was 6-10 there was a solid group of guys in my grade at the private christian school I attended where we always signed up to be on the same rec league. We got very very good for a few years because we played during recess and practiced at our school a few times a week. One of the dads of my classmate's was from Panama and coached us. Sadly after my family left the school/community I started to slowly become an unathletic nerd.
My son is 7 and gives 0 effort in soccer. Drives me nuts. If he tried and sucked that’s fine by me but he doesn’t give a shit, but when we ask if he wants to play he says yes. Just likes to goof off with the boys on the sidelines
Better to learn now that you can’t count on people to have the same drive as yourself. It only gets worse, kid! Seriously tho, that stinks, hope it doesn’t sour sports for him.
I will say the past few games he’s started really enjoying playing goalie so maybe there’s something there. Unfortunately the coach always lets his shitty son play goalie
Exactly where I ended up last night. I was proud of him for recognizing that his peers weren’t as upset as he was. he starts another more competitive league next week. He wants to keep going and do more. I’m not pushing him at all. I’m hoping to god he gets a team that will have some sort of organization/competitive spirit.
I avoided coaching until my son had a terrible coach. Once you have had a coach suck the fun out of sports for your kid, you reconsider quickly.
I get that, but this league only allows two coaches and only up to two automatic players, if a coach has two sons in the same age group thats his two automatics The other coach I volunteered to help only has one son
The old adage applies: there's good, cheap, and not a germ factory. You can pick two. Neither of which can be cheap or being a germ factory.
Another big milestone for my little man. Again, 4 years old. Wife was out of town on a girls trip last weekend. He and I went to our weekly brunch spot at the golf course. He was vibing and coloring, and I needed to quickly grab a voucher from the pro shop I had forgotten last weekend. (You can see our patio table from the shop). We also hadn’t seen our server in a while. I half jokingly asked him to get me a beer if the guy walked by. Anyway, I walk back and see the tables around us all in stitches with a few guys reaching out for high fives and giving him lots of praise. He had walked up to the one extremely attractive girl server at a completely different table, tugged on her pant leg, and said “Can you please get my Dad a beer?” Should have seen the twinkle in her eyes as she dropped it off
She is my current celebrity exception tbf. I assume she has an OF, so qualifies as a celebrity on that technicality
My wife would disagree, but a six year old is more than old enough to leave in the car (assuming it's not a hot summer day) for like 5 minutes while you run inside a convenience store to get something right? It's 10x more trouble getting her in and out and telling her she can't have a toy just so I can pick up something we forgot during our weekly grocery run.
Let's assume this is a safe suburb and I'm no more than 50 feet from my car in the parking lot with my kid in it. My mom did this starting when I was around 6 or 7 but not sure if this is one of those behaviors that is less acceptable now.
I do this if I need to run into the gas station or picking up take out and he wants to wait in the car and listen to some shitty Disney soundtrack. He’s 3.5. I guess I wouldn’t do it if I’m going into a place where I can’t keep an eye on him at 3.5, but 6 seems old enough for that.
6 is the age where i tell him to watch his little sister and i'll be right back. don't let anybody in to the car. daddy needs to pick up some smokes.
Illegal in CA until 7 for any duration unless someone over the age of 12 is present to supervise, just as a general fyi
That's a no for me, although I'm sure my mom did it and it was fine. My 5 year old can unbuckle his car seat by himself, so I just bring him with. There's just too many weird things that can potentially happen, even if it's remote
Leave my 9 and 7 year old in the car when I’m picking up dad sodas from the corner store. They are still alive.
Last time my wife went out of town, my son came down with strep and the flu on night one. This time? Puked his guts out in bed.
I'm suddenly incapable of transferring my kid to his crib. I can rock him to sleep no problem, but the second I go to stand up his eyes pop open. Meanwhile, my wife can still do it no problem. Fucked with it for 3.5 hours when he woke up in the middle of the night before I finally tapped out and called her in to get it done. I'm tired.
Dump him in there and let him cry, he will figure it out. I tell you this as a dad of four with my eldest (7) being the worst sleeper to this day which I attribute to us doing shit like you're talking about. Think you're doing them a solid by making sure they're asleep and peaceful, next thing you know - the fuckers turn into terrible sleepers.
This. When im with my daughter at night I feed her/change her if needed then lay her down in her crib. I dont stay up there more than 10 minutes. It takes a couple days of crying it out but they will eventually go to sleep.
My wife and I are going through a similar deal with our 2 year old and getting him down for the night. We try stimulating him when we get home from work/daycare but it still takes around an hour on average to get him for the night. My wife wants to do the sleep training stuff but I figured I’d do some crowd sourcing before shelling out $300 for something that may or may not work.